Sleep work
Or putting my phone in its place
It’s Wednesday and I’m feeling so much better, sleeping better and having less anxiety, overall. What’s going on? Well, this past Saturday, I finally got to my breaking point with my relationship to how I use my phone and being online. I’d fallen into some really bad habits and needed to make a serious change. I finally acted on the advice I’d seen around for years of leaving my phone in another room overnight. That little (ok, HUGE) change made a hell of a difference! It wasn’t just about a change of overnight venue for the phone. I recognized that I needed to not use it for at least an hour before bed and, most importantly, not use it first thing in the morning until I’ve been up out of bed for at least an hour. It’s only been three full days, but so far, so good.
Sleep
The quality of my sleep has been pretty bad in recent years and in no small part due to my phone usage. Normally, before falling asleep, I’d go online to “check out a couple of things” before sleeping and wind up scrolling, posting, responding to posts, etc… and two hours have passed. I’d finally put the phone away, wake up to maybe use the bathroom, come back to bed and my mind would be racing about all sorts of things. My antidote? Pick up the phone to distract me. I’d eventually get back to sleep, but not before being on the phone for at least another hour.
The one thing that I missed in all of this was how much being online was contributing to my anxiety and inability to sleep better. I used to think that I was really good about filtering out the constant barrage of news and the opinions of thousands of people about an infinite number of topics in a short amount of time. I like being informed, but what I’ve come to realize, is that we really aren’t meant to handle so much information coming at us all of the time. Particularly harmful are the effects of taking in so much of the negative information from trolls, bots (and people) putting out mis and disinformation, and all of the bad news that’s happening all at once.
Sure, there are a lot of good things happening, but more of what we take in and what affects us online, is the negativity. So, changing how I end my nights and start the mornings has been crucial for my mental well-being and my sleep. I’ve been able to actually wake up feeling rested instead of anxious. I have plenty in my life to be anxious about, but I don’t need to contribute to it by being online so much. For now, my online activity is limited on my phone.
Physical issues
Eye strain had been really bad for me. So much so, that my vision was compromised due to staring at my phone screen so much. It got so bad that my eyes would cross and I’d have double vision. That has alleviated a lot, not only due to the nighttime and morning routine, but also not looking at the phone much during the day unless absolutely necessary.
One of the side effects has been not feeling compelled to post on my social media channels nearly as much. That’s been something that I’ve been working on, anyway. This is just giving me more incentive to reexamine my online habits. I’ve already been making Substack the center of my dissemination of information and leaning into that more and more recently. I’m slowly weaning myself off of the dopamine hits (or the search for them) that social media keeps us wrapped up in.
Everything is in flux, but the most important thing is that I’m being more intentional with my time and not letting myself fall into scrolling unnecessarily.
I’m only three days into this new routine and my quality of life is much, much better. I’m going to suggest that, if you can, try keeping your phone in another room over night or at the very least away from directly next to your bed. This new routine is a lot to get used to because, just this morning, I reflexively reached for it on the small nightstand I have. I dealt with momentary disappointment, took a sip of water and settled in for another30 minutes of sleep.
My hope is that this might help someone work towards a healthier relationship with their phone usage and being online. Nothing is perfect, but you have to start somewhere. Every little step you take can make a difference, but you have to be willing to go there, first. Maintaining the discipline might be hard, but I’m looking forward to it being easier as time goes on.
With the exception of getting soaked by rain on my way to the studio on my bike, the rest of the day has been pretty amazing.
[Seen]
Here’s a couple of shows I’ve gotten around to seeing lately
2024 Wind Challenge Exhibition Series #3 at Fleisher Art Memorial
More about the Wind Challenge Series
NDA at Paradigm Gallery
Website: NDA | Instagram: @ndastreetart
Studio :: 7.24.24
Something new I’m experimenting with. I took some patterned paper and cut it up to make a bunch of triangular shapes like the ones that appear in my new paintings. Collaged those to this paper that I prepared beforehand. Trying some different ways of working with these shapes to see what’s possible. There’s more to think about and to do, like changing the color of the triangle shapes, but maintain the floral pattern that runs throughout. Letting this sit over night to see how I feel about next moves when I’m in next, probably tomorrow. The paper size is 30” x 22”.
This weird piece came into being a couple of weeks ago. I wasn’t sure about how I felt about it because of the overwhelming feeling of a face sitting there when I turned it from the vertical to horizontal orientation.
I let it sit, going back and forth about what to do about it and last Friday, I thought it might be fun to lean into the “anxious face”. Honestly, it fits for how I’ve felt for a while and I’m sure a lot of you have been feeling, for various reasons. I’m letting it live in this state. No title yet and It’s on unstretched canvas, 35 x 35 inches.
A bit of today’s studio sounds:
See you in a few days!